Last updated on August 14th, 2025

Whether you’re planning a mountaintop ceremony or lakeside vows outside your cozy cabin, making your marriage legally binding can feel like a bit of a headache with all the paperwork and requirements. In the US, you usually need to follow a standardized process, depending on the state you’re in. This guide will walk you through everything you need to know about making your marriage legal, whether you choose to go through the legalities before, during, or after your elopement day. I’ll also go through some important legal considerations for LGBTQ+ folks in terms of marriage laws and protections, especially in times like this.

Is Eloping Legal?

First things first (because people still question elopements)—yes, eloping is 100% legal! There’s a common myth floating around that eloping is some sort of secret or unofficial ceremony, but in reality, in today’s times, it’s just another way to get married.

How to Make Your Marriage Legal

When you elope, you have options. It can be either a legal ceremony or a symbolic ceremony. While some people love the feeling of making their marriage legal on the day of, there are absolutely no rules saying your elopement has to be legally binding on that exact day. This is something you should discuss with your partner during the elopement planning process. If you decide you do want a legal ceremony, timing and preparation are everything!

Read more: The Ultimate Guide to LGBTQ+ Elopements

What is a Legal Ceremony?

If you want your elopement day to be both a celebration and a legally binding event, you’ll need to meet the legal requirements in the location where you elope. Typically, this includes having an officiant and witnesses (unless you elope in a self-solemnizing state) and signing your marriage license that same day. You’ll generally have to go through a few steps, depending on where you decide to get married:

1. Get your marriage license

In the US, you’ll need to apply for a marriage license in the state where you’re getting married. Some states allow you to apply online while others require you to visit a courthouse or county clerk’s office in person. Here are some things to keep in mind:

• You’ll usually need to provide identification, like a passport or driver’s license.
• You’ll likely need to pay a fee, which can range from $20 to $115. Note that some fees can be reduced if you complete premarital counseling. 
• Some states might have mandatory waiting periods between applying for and receiving your marriage license. This is usually three days or less.
• Marriage licenses have an expiration date, and this can vary depending on the state. For example, marriage licenses in Michigan expire after 33 days while marriage licenses in Minnesota expire after 6 months.

Pro Tip: Avoid signing your papers in another country unless you’re doing it for residency purposes! It will be a much simpler process if you do this legal part at home.

2. Find an Officiant

Most states also require an officiant to sign your marriage license. This can be a judge, a religious leader, or even a friend or family member who’s ordained (which is often easy to do online!). 

Some places, like Colorado, Illinois, Pennsylvania, and Montana, allow you to self-solemnize, meaning you don’t need an officiant—just the two of you declaring your commitment and signing your marriage license. 

As your photographer, I can also sign your marriage license if you don’t feel like you need a whole scripted ceremony!

Read more: How to Find a Queer-Friendly Officiant

3. Get Witnesses (If Needed)

Many states also require witnesses to sign your marriage license. Generally, you’ll be required to find two witnesses over the age of 18. If you’re eloping with just the two of you and no guests, don’t stress! Your photographer (hi, that’s me!) can often serve as a witness and so can a park ranger, a tour guide, or even a stranger who happens to be nearby. Keep in mind that when recruiting a stranger as a witness, you’ll want to find someone who gives off good, non-homophobic vibes.

In self-solemnizing states, witnesses aren’t required.

Another Tip: Sometimes it’s not practical to have two witnesses present on elopements. Since there is no real way to check if they were there the moment they say “I do,” your witnesses technically don’t need to be there during the actual ceremony. Just make sure you have someone who would be willing to sign afterward. 

4. Sign and File Your License

Once your ceremony is complete, your officiant and witness (if needed) will sign your marriage license. You (or your officiant) will need to submit the signed license to the local government office, usually by mail or in person, to receive a copy of your official marriage certificate. Keep in mind that different states might have different time frames. In Minnesota, for example, your license needs to be filed within five days of signing.

Read more: How to Elope in Minnesota (Includes legal requirements!)

What is a Symbolic Ceremony?

Think about a symbolic ceremony as a way to exchange vows and celebrate your love without the legal paperwork involved (at least not at that moment). Many people, including LGBTQIA+ couples, choose this route if they’re eloping in a place where their marriage may not be legally recognized or if they just want to keep things simple and separate the emotional celebration from the legal process. Some people also choose this route if they are eloping in a dream location out-of-state (or country) but want their official marriage license to be from their home state.

If you choose a symbolic ceremony, you typically have a couple of options:

1. Handle the legalities before the elopement. This could mean visiting your local courthouse to sign the official paperwork and then heading off to your dream elopement without the stress of legal logistics.
2. Handle the legalities after the elopement. You can also choose to wait until after the elopement. There really isn’t a difference in the process if you choose before or after. It all depends on your own preferences.

Note that the actual process for making your marriage legal before or after your elopement is the same as if you decide to make it legal on your elopement day (apply for a marriage license, find an officiant and witnesses if needed, and sign and file your license). The only difference here is that when you choose a symbolic ceremony, you don’t have to worry about timing the paperwork and requirements to align with your elopement day.

Pro Tip: For the most up-to-date state-specific processes and requirements, check out your chosen state government’s website. You can also contact your county clerk’s office for this information.

Which Option is Right For You?

There’s no right or wrong way to make your marriage legal. If you want your elopement day to be focused purely on the two of you, a symbolic ceremony with legal paperwork before or after might be the best fit. If you want your elopement to be both an emotional and legal milestone, handling the legalities during your ceremony is also totally doable with a little planning. Just keep in mind that if you choose the latter, you’ll need to factor marriage license waiting periods and expiration dates into your elopement planning timeline.

Legal Considerations for LGBTQIA+ Elopements

When planning an elopement as an LGBTQ+ couple, the legal side of things can be a bit more complicated depending on where you’re getting married. Unfortunately, as we know, the laws aren’t always supportive of our love. So, it’s important to know where your marriage will be legally recognized.

LGBTQIA+ Marriage in the United States

Thankfully, as of 2025, LGBTQ+ marriages remain legal in all 50 states after the 2015 Supreme Court ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges. This decision essentially made it unconstitutional for states to ban same-sex marriage, ensuring marriage equality nationwide.

One thing to keep in mind is that some states still have old constitutional amendments or laws banning same-sex marriage. Because of the federal Obergefell v. Hodges decision, these bans are unenforceable. However, if the Supreme Court were to ever overturn or weaken its 2015 ruling, the legalities of marriage would fall back to the states, which would leave us queer folks potentially unprotected. Especially in a time like this, it’s important to remain vigilant and be aware of state-level protections where you live or intend to get married.

On a positive note, a handful of states have taken extra steps to protect marriage equality at the state level, meaning that even if federal protections changed, marriage rights would remain intact. If you’re concerned about long-term legal recognition, these are the safest states to elope in:

• West Coast & Pacific: Washington, California, Hawaii, Nevada
• Mountain: Colorado
• Midwest: Minnesota, Illinois
• East Coast & Northeast: New York, New Jersey, Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Connecticut, Delaware, Maryland, District of Columbia
• Southwest: New Mexico

You can check the Movement Advancement Project’s Marriage Recognition Laws map for up-to-date, state-by-state laws (including positive laws and marriage bans) and Equaldex for recent LGBTQ+ law changes.

For a more in-depth look at each state’s stance on LGBTQ+ rights and equality, you can also check out the Movement Advancement Project’s Equality by State map.

International LGBTQIA+ Marriage Laws 

In most cases, it makes the most sense logistically to get your official marriage license signed in your home state instead of navigating the complexities of marriage abroad. Generally, I recommend that if you choose an international elopement, you make the ceremony purely symbolic. 

Either way, you’ll still need to do some extra research to understand the legal and social stances on queer marriage. As a rule of thumb, I wouldn’t even have a symbolic ceremony in a place that is known to be against gay marriages or actively criminalizes LGBTQIA+ people and our relationships. 

There are currently 38 countries where same-sex marriage is legal, with Thailand and Liechtenstein being the most recent additions to the list. Of those countries, here are some of the most LGBTQ+-affirming ones that you might consider:

• Canada
• Mexico
• Australia
• New Zealand
• United Kingdom
• Iceland
• Ireland
• Most of Western Europe, including France, Spain, Portugal, Germany, and the Netherlands.

Read more: How to Elope in Ireland

Before choosing an elopement destination, check current laws and be mindful of your safety. There are still lots of countries out there that don’t recognize same-sex marriage and others that go as far as to criminalize LGBTQ+ people and relationships. Resources like the Human Rights Campaign provide up-to-date resources detailing marriage equality worldwide. Equaldex also provides a current equality index map with updates regarding LGBTQ+ law changes around the world.

Additional Resource: Protecting LGBTQ+ Rights After the Election

I attended a panel recently with two lawyers and a financial planner who discussed ways queer folks can protect themselves outside of marriage. The goal is to ensure you’re extra protected, especially in the possible event that marriage equality is overturned. 

This is specific to Minnesota and not official legal advice, but I wanted to share it with you anyway!

Next Steps

While planning an elopement is a lot about having fun, letting your dreams run wild, and feeling a rush of freedom, legal considerations are still an important piece of the puzzle—especially for us LGBTQ+ folks! That’s why it’s important to know the legal process, understand your rights, choose an affirming location, and make sure your marriage is legally recognized. Doing your due diligence will help you feel like your new chapter is starting on the right foot. 

If you need guidance on finding the perfect place to elope or want a photographer who will affirm and celebrate your love story, I’d love to chat and help bring your dream day to life!